Y I h8 SMS

SMS being text messaging in a more compact name, since our already highly-efficient language obviously needs compactness. But I digress.

There may be people in the world who can wittily and accurately say what they mean in 60 characters or less, and there may well be people to whom it is not a matter of note whether or not they accurately and wittily say what they intend. I, unhappily and happily, respectively, am not one of them. IM is bad enough for misinterpretations, because it requires less thought even than an email, and has less personality than a person's voice, or even handwriting. But whoever created SMS did a thing far, far worse than anyone else had ever done.

I love words. I love the way they taste when I say them, and I love the way they flow together under my fingers, creating sentences with sense that can even occasionally be a pleasure to behold. But most of all, I love the way they do what they were intended to do- communicate.

I love turning to my palette and choosing the appropriate word to placate my palate (Might someone suggest a better word for "turning" or "choosing" in that sentence?). But alas, they do not exist!

What doesn't exist? My mind! I mean, the words in my mind that I'm trying to say...

ahem. Excuse the Odyssey moment.

To conclude. It has been conclusively proven that SMS is less than human. And does not make sufficient allowances for writing majors. So I suppose I shall just keep taking twice as long to answer and being charged twice as much when the phone decides that my message is not one, but two.